[there were plenty of times keigo wanted to leap right back in. every saturday night for a month were the hardest to get through. but he never returned. instead, he would curl in the empty bed, crying himself to sleep. there was no dabi. and there were no wings.
dabi's scent was on his pillows though. he tried to find comfort in them, but they were fading. he could smell it again, if he ever chose to live in san junipero for his after life choice. he won't though.
he tells himself that, yet...
how many months has it been? the first evening he returns to this simulation, he sticks to the shadows of alleyways, just eying the atmosphere. contemplating. the second week, he works up the nerve to enter tuckers, but stays hidden in the dark. dabi wasn't there though. the third week, after confirming his former lover wasn't within the bar, he tries to have a little fun. drinking and dancing.
it's now his fourth week visiting, and he's again back at tuckers. he's still unsure of being here, unsure if this is what he wants. sure, no responsibility, getting to live life peacefully. it sounds perfect. he never had that. but permanently here. lonely. it makes him scared and nervous. what if dabi came across him? keigo was still broken up about his former lover. all he does in that white bed is cough and cry.
he gave his word to never come back too. the city was big. but it was small too.
he avoids the quagmire like the plague. honestly, he should avoid tuckers too. but, the night air is nice, and the music is perfect to dance to.
to make himself look less out in the open, keigo no longer wears his wings. generally, he keeps his back exposed though, where he purposely has two red wings tattooed in their place. hip bones are constantly exposed, and keigo pretends to like the touches there when he grinds and dances with other people. if they were familiar, belonging to the man within his dreams, keigo would purr and beg for more. but no. none of it was familiar. so he pretends.
but when he's urged back, like now, into a hot, sweaty body, he goes with it. he keeps his eyes closed, trying to forget the hell that was his life now. he never did check the club for dabi's presence. but, he's under the impression he wouldn't come across his former lover at tuckers anyway.]
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zvi and
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Date: 2021-03-02 03:08 am (UTC)dabi's scent was on his pillows though. he tried to find comfort in them, but they were fading. he could smell it again, if he ever chose to live in san junipero for his after life choice. he won't though.
he tells himself that, yet...
how many months has it been? the first evening he returns to this simulation, he sticks to the shadows of alleyways, just eying the atmosphere. contemplating. the second week, he works up the nerve to enter tuckers, but stays hidden in the dark. dabi wasn't there though. the third week, after confirming his former lover wasn't within the bar, he tries to have a little fun. drinking and dancing.
it's now his fourth week visiting, and he's again back at tuckers. he's still unsure of being here, unsure if this is what he wants. sure, no responsibility, getting to live life peacefully. it sounds perfect. he never had that. but permanently here. lonely. it makes him scared and nervous. what if dabi came across him? keigo was still broken up about his former lover. all he does in that white bed is cough and cry.
he gave his word to never come back too. the city was big. but it was small too.
he avoids the quagmire like the plague. honestly, he should avoid tuckers too. but, the night air is nice, and the music is perfect to dance to.
to make himself look less out in the open, keigo no longer wears his wings. generally, he keeps his back exposed though, where he purposely has two red wings tattooed in their place. hip bones are constantly exposed, and keigo pretends to like the touches there when he grinds and dances with other people. if they were familiar, belonging to the man within his dreams, keigo would purr and beg for more. but no. none of it was familiar. so he pretends.
but when he's urged back, like now, into a hot, sweaty body, he goes with it. he keeps his eyes closed, trying to forget the hell that was his life now. he never did check the club for dabi's presence. but, he's under the impression he wouldn't come across his former lover at tuckers anyway.]