creamation | texty.

I like that title. But I'll try to keep all my feathers.

Oh Touya. He should never say that to you. I would do anything to get him to leave you alone, once and for all.

Sure, you can come help me practice. Just keep saying things that make me smile goofy.

I want our first time to be something you always think about. With you though, I'm sure I won't be that nervous. I trust you. And, we'll do things slowly too. We'll find a way to make it all work.

Maybe I should tell you about my childhood. I've been around a lot of bad people too. Your dad is a different kind of bad, but mine was rotten too. I'm not going to be like him. I want to protect something dear and close to me, and that's you.

silly little bird? good, you need those feathers.

i gave him what he wanted. he'll stay away for a while now, i hope.

what's the difference between when they fall out when you fret, or when you're just being all bashful?

i want our first time to be something you always think about too. something special and not just cause they tell us we need to. thanks, keigo. thanks for trying to make it work. i'm sorry i'm so darn weird about sex.

i want you to tell me. just maybe not like this. i feel like a lot of this stuff we should be talking about face to face. i just know how different it is when men with great power are bad.

Yeah. I like bird nicknames I guess. Ah. But don't tell anyone.

Touya...Well. I really hope he does. But, let me know if he comes again, okay?

If they're used during training, like when I fight, I really can't attached them back on. I lose my focus with them because I spent so much time using them to protect or fight with. But, with fretting or when I get bashful, I can focus on them more. I'm starting to be able to feel more with them too. Like, I can pick up when someone touches them, even if they're not attached to my wing.

I know I'll always think about it, cause you'll be here. I definitely don't want them to see us on our first time. Honestly, I just wanna pass the stupid thing and not be forced to do it over and over again for them. I only want you to see me during sex. And you're not weird at all. I'll respect your boundaries. I want us to do stuff right, even if we're doing it kind of backwards with the whole sex thing.

I'll tell you everything in person. It's a bit much to unpack here anyway. I guess we should have waited until you got back to the room to talk about stuff.

I won't. these are our special nicknames for each other.

I don't want you involved with him. the further away he stays from you the better. besides, I'm used to it.

that's so cool. so if I touch them you can feel them even if we're across the room or something? maybe eventually you won't even have to concentrate so hard.

what do we have to do for actual training? I want what we do together to be different than that. different from everything.

it's okay. I still wanted to talk to you anyway. this class is so boring.

Good!

Can you at least come to me after? I know you don’t want me around him, but I don’t like you suffering alone.

Yeah. They’re super sensitive, like one of my handlers touched it and I got really hot in my face. I don’t like it when they touch me, but you’re different. I like it when you touch them. And clean them!

From the guidelines, you’re supposed to act like a villain while I seduce you. I have to use my mouth to make you orgasm first. And then we have intercourse.

I wish all our classes were the same.

my favorite nickname for you is still Kei, though. it's so pretty.

...i wanted to be alone. i don't want people to see me after he does things to me. i'm dirty and disgusting.

you should sharpen them when they try to touch them. maybe now that we're sex partners they won't touch them as much. maybe.

they're just gonna watch us do that?? do they really think you're gonna use your mouth on a villain? that's so stupid! why would you even be in that position? and how am i supposed to act like a villain? that's crazy.

me too. the ones without you are the woooorst.

I like it too. Or, I like the way you say it.

You're not dirty or disgusting, Touya. I just want to be there for you, is all. You shouldn't have to burden everything.

I really hope they don't touch me much or at all while we do that class. Or maybe ever again. I only want you to touch me.

I'm not even sure how I would go about doing that to a villain. Like, why would a villain want that? Does it feel good for them or something? Wouldn't they be worried I'd bite it off? But, maybe we can try to make you sound like a villain sometime? I might just laugh though.

Should we bug the handlers into giving us all the same classes.

how do i say it?

but i am. i don't want you to look at me either. i don't want you to ever see that again.

you only want me to touch you? are you sure? there are a lot of other people you could be with, you know.

no villain would ever want to be with a pro-hero. like why would they even go there, right? that's why i feel like this is such BS, kei. i could never sound like a villain!

we could try!

Well, when you say it, it makes me feel warm. In my chest. And I always smile. Unless you're teasing me about something, then I'm usually plotting how to get back at you with tickles.

You're not. Not at all. What if, after you cleaned up? I just want to make sure you're doing alright. I'm useless now and can't stop him yet, but I can at least comfort you.

I don't want anyone else. I just want you to touch me.

Would it help if I pretended to be the villain? I can try and act mean. And you can be the hero who stops me.

Okay, let's do it!

i like making you feel warm. and i like making you smile.

i don't need comforting, alright?? i can handle it. i just wanna be alone.

i want that too.

i dunno. that would be pretty stupid too. neither of us could pull off a good villain.

you think they'll listen to us?

That makes me happy, Touya.

Okay.

Then it's settled, only you touch me.

I guess so. But, I don't want to have to repeat them watching us have sex just until they're satisfied. So, why not kind of practice being a villain? We can do it during training too.

Can't hurt to try, right?

i'm nervous, kei. what if this thing we do changes things between us?

i don't want you to change what you're gonna do cause of me either, ok? and especially not cause of him.

i can't promise you the same. i'm sorry.

...okay. just cause i dont want to repeat it too. we can practice being villains i guess. or... i guess just me, right? i've gotta be the villain.

Do we stop then?

Touya...

I know you can't. It's okay. You don't have to apologize.

I can still try and be the villain if it helps you get comfortable. We just gotta take it one step at a time.

i don't know.

i'm serious, keigo.

i still need to, though, because i hate it. i hate him.

okay. how do we even practice being a villain, though?

Maybe we just wait and see how it goes?

What about you?

But it's not your fault. It's his. He's the one who does this to you.

Should I surprise you as one when you get back to the room?

but what if we wait and see how it goes and it goes badly?

maybe he'll stop when i'm good enough. i just have to get better.

this is stupid. all of this is stupid.

sure, whatever.

That's what happens when you take big risks like these. Do you...want to remain as friends, then?

What if he doesn't? You shouldn't have to live like this.

Touya, don't say that.

Okay.

i know, but. no. i don't want you to be sad.

i can't think like that, keigo. if i think that he'll never let up, i don't know what i'll do. you're right i can't live like this. i have to be better.

why not?? it's fucking true.

you shouldn't have to be the villain. i'll do it.

Touya, I don’t want you to force yourself to be in a relationship. You shouldn’t be with me to keep me from being sad. It’s a big risk, I understand that. We can still be friends. It’s okay.

Is there any way I can help you?

I just, I wish you weren’t in this situation. I feel helpless.

Are you sure? I don’t mind training with you on it.

i'm just scared, keigo. you're the only good thing i have in my life. i don't wanna lose you.

i just have to train harder. i have to get my body to stop burning.

you help me more than you know. you help me all the time, keigo. i just wish i could give you more.

i guess if you really want to.

You’ll never lose me, Touya. You’re my one and only friend. That’s why I want us to only do this if we both agree to the risk. I don’t want to lose you because I pushed you into a relationship.

Then let me train with you. There’s gotta be a way to get you stronger without your fire burning you.

You always give me so much. That’s why I feel helpless. You’re doing so much. I admire that.

I can be a great villain. I just hope I don’t scare you.

can't we just be how we always are with each other? just... closer? i dunno. sorry.

i don't want to hurt you.

i don't feel like i'm doing so much. what is there to admire?

if you scare me that just means you're doing a good job of it.

Isn’t that how relationships are supposed to be? Just really close best friends who kiss and stuff? Or, is it the kissing that you don’t wanna do?

We have a safe word if it hurts.

You keep me going. You make me feel like I can do anything. I see a strong hero who is going to do a lot of good in the world. I believe in you.

Okay good! Then I’m going to do it when you get in here.

i dunno. i guess that's how they're supposed to be. but that's not really how they are in movies, are they? they're not really best friends. i do wanna kiss you though! i do.

soba?

i make you feel that way? oh... thanks, keigo. i think that's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

once this class is over i can come back.

We’ll make our own type of relationship then. Best friends who kiss and stuff. I wanna give you lots of kisses.

Soba!

You’re welcome, Touya. Never think you’re not special, because you really are.

Great! I’m looking forward to being a villain.

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